Note to world #832

I practice the half smile meditation pose just in case it really might improve my mood …. even though it makes me feel crazy fake. 

My sister calls from the hospital where she has retreated to have a nervous breakdown and I let it ring through to voicemail. Then I listen to her mad ramblings over and over again in case they make more sense the more I hear them. But instead, like a word I stare at too long, her thoughts jumble around and become less recognizable to me. 

And that makes me half smile all day long. 


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